Yesterday, I left the office early and got to browse through SM Makati’s merchandise with the sun still up. The feeling was exquisite. I went to the grocery, bought sausages and sugar free juice, strolled at the center thoroughfare lined with Chinese New Year products such as TIKOY, Good luck charms and ham. I opted to go healthy instead and bought 2 packs of sliced Guava, took a seat at the metal chairs, read a new book I was carrying for the entire day and began to munch on the fruit’s brand of sweetness.
At around 5 pm – 6 pm I noticed that my dad was late. I would normally be infuriated, but somehow the book and the fruit became my instant calming agents. I also specifically got hooked observing the massive thoroughfare of people mostly on their way home. Dressed in uniforms or semi-casuals with focused facial expressions and steady strides resemble a more relaxed modern march of humanity. Others who are in deep thought and conversation still manage to catch a glimpse of what’s going on around them. Amidst various worries, prayers and triumphs in life’s human aspects of distractions, some may even had the time to ponder on buying tikoy or remembering the latest Year of the Ox fortune reports that are circulating all over broadsheets, blog sites and emails. Some would stop, look and observe, while others forge on.
Looking at the busyness of 5 pm – 6 pm, my mass takes part in the sea of professionals getting through life day by day. If I have the capability to read minds and listen to people’s thoughts involuntarily, I might have gone crazy on the spot. Walking in crowded commuting stations, main thoroughfare malls in the central business district, is witnessing man’s battle with life, self and the world. Seeing them in silence, but with mind in constant trail of thought makes me feel courageous, bold and forgiving to my kind.
I suddenly realized despite the anguish, hurt and uncertainties of life, there are still a lot of things to be thankful for. These are the times that I would count myself as part of the lucky ones despite the turbulent feelings of failure, fear and frustrations that at least I am familiar with. There are times that you just feel thankful that life’s been kinder to you or kinder to the people around you. It’s thanking the little things that would continue to overwhelm you. Thanking for health, for money to put on the table, for a job, for nursing a constant surge of creativity and for these main reasons we feel thankful. I may not be entirely proud of where I am right now, but pride is relative. I am still thankful nevertheless.
I may not know the thoughts, prayers and anguish of these people, but I believe all our thoughts fall under one umbrella. It might take different shapes, intensities and concerns, but it’s not something that is unrecognizable. It’s nice to step back and observe sometimes. Aside from the feelings of awe and deep connection, you feel humble. Be thankful for witnessing man’s constant struggle to life. In that aspect, be thankful that you’re never alone.