I've learned so much this midweek, but I'm not going to do any academic summary. I just thought about what I learned about myself when was getting popcorn from SM Cinema three hours ago, and I was this close to losing my mind. Apparently the three brilliant movie popcorn ladies took their time getting a small tumbler of popcorn, finding the salt and actually analyzing which codes to input in their cash register. It was a mixture of an OJT on the line of fire with a commander who didn't know what to do. The other is a useless observant, even a guest could do better.
They caught me in the bad time. The movie was about to start in 3 minutes. NOt that it's their fault, but they should have realized that their tasks need to be sharp and efficient. They cannot avoid people who barely have time and to be contributing to the delay would just crucify them. Not all people would want to miss the trailers.
Good thing I saved my cousin from a heart attack and embarrassment. I sat down, collected my cool and barely missed the entire trailer. I don't know if I should be thanking Guthrie-Jensen for two straight days of training. Aside from the learning (Of course) that meant no work for 2 days. Only tasks included were to sit back, relax, learn while having fun and enjoy free catered food, which turned out to be sumptuous. I have to ask our training coordinator of the caterer first thing tomorrow morning.
Anyways, I found out I was required to attend one of those soft skill trainings. The thing with soft skills training is it's often such a bore. They discuss things that are so common and vague about humans or professionals that the topics are often redundant and ambitious. No offense, but I'd rather learn some grand skill that I could clearly actually see and use like managing reports, presentation delivery and various tech solutions stuff. When I found out that I'll be attending a soft skill training as it popped in my outlook calendar, I knew I needed to double up my caffeine doze.
I looked at the records and called our training coordinator if I could excuse myself. She didn't say yes or no. She just sold me the whole idea of going. She firmly believes that it's a session that I shouldn't miss. She even sold me the idea that it would greatly help me relate with colleagues all over the world. I have to remind myself that what I've said was an excuse and not a foolproof reason. Gosh, might as well go before I end up falling trap to my own lie. So I got my coffee mug, my pen and left a succinct note at my desk just in case someone looks for me, which I doubt.
When I got to the conference room at the other floor I thought my vision wavered. I was to attend an ASSERTIVENESS COMMUNICATION Training. Assertiveness what? Great. Hit me where it hurts. Assertiveness is something I feel I have, but I project I don't. I'm often too Aggressive or too passive aggressive not to care. I wonder who squealed me in...hmm...
So I attended the first day and suffered from a round of getting to know you sessions. After surviving, we were broken up to teams, had to make a cheer and agree on the definition of assertiveness. Naturally, in our group at first no one wanted to speak. NO one was quite assertive enough. So I tapped my pen and prayed to survive till lunch or else I would use my original excuse to work. So I offered to define Assertiveness based on my knowledge and belief. From there, I knew it's going to be a piece of cake.
Assertiveness has always a reason behind it. Being assertive is being calculated and rational on getting things done. It's a way of sending out a message of your needs and wants without confrontation, domination and manipulation. It never sends out messages in form of emotions unlike what Aggressiveness does. Assertiveness is more difficult to achieve, especially in our own culture. Small things done to us immediately are noticed as aggressive, and it just so happens we're generally known to be the submissive types. So you could see where it clashes and how glaring losing one's cool is in this country.
I have always believed that I was being assertive of my wants and needs. I might not ask people to get my needs and wants for me, but I say what I please. If I don't want to go to Jollibee for lunch, I won't, and I don't expect people to follow or understand me. I'll get a take out from McDonald's instead then join then in Jollibee. I'm pretty flexible and an independent type of person when getting things done. But sometimes people and situations test us. I must admit I often flair up and get irrational. I often cross that thin line to aggressiveness, believe me. Me, assertive? Give me a break.
I know I have to work out on my dealings with people. Sometimes I don't care too much that it's easier for me to submit to their stupid whims. This time I should assert myself without sounding aggressive. That will be my lifetime challenge, to care, but not to aggressively care. Am I making sense?
Well, the fact is, I know that I'm not a 100% assertive. I have so much to practice and learn, but I found out something about myself. Thank god I didn't apply for any call center post, I could've gotten myself and more people in trouble.
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